R-E-S-P-E-C-T

 (sang by Aretha, written by Otis)


I always pictured this song being written by a women.  After all Aretha does a wonderful job of singing it.  It was actually written by a man.  Very telling to what our husbands need.  A God given need for respect.

I have been reading a book on Marriage.  My sister gave it

to me.  Its called Love and Respect.  Lets start by saying this...

I never thought it was a great idea to get married.  I was

not the girl who dreamed of her wedding and dreamed of

being a wife and adoring her husband and respecting and

listening to him and obeying him.  I could go on and on.

I always, always knew marriage would be so hard at times.

I knew it would take more than me

to make it work.

I have a great husband.  Not a perfect husband.

I do know this for sure. I love him. God gave him to me. 

 He is mine.  Gods word tells me how to act towards him. 

How to feel about him, even when I don't agree with him. 

What exactly does God's word say about all

of this marriage stuff.  What is the key to a happy

married relationship.

Ephesians 5:33 says ...each one of you also must love his wife

as he loves himself, and his wife should respect her husband.

He isn't calling for love here.  Maybe, we need love first, maybe,

they need respect first. 

Titus 2:4  ...they can train the younger women to love

their husbands and children.  In this passage "love" is

"phileo" love which refers to a human brotherly

kind of love.  In this book Emerson Eggerichs refers to it

as a shoulder to shoulder love. How respected and needed would
our husbands feel if we just sat shoulder to shoulder with them, even 
when we didn't feel like it.

Genesis 2:  20 - 23 ... no suitable helper was found... God took

one of man's ribs... God made women.."this is now bone of my

bone flesh of my flesh, she shall be called woman

for she was taken out of man."

I Peter 3:1-2 ... (dealing with an unbelieving husband but

makes sense for a lot more)  ...they may be won without a word

but by the behavior of their wives.

I believe some of these scriptures can be a big

part of the key.  Respect can mean more to them they the

love part we need.  They may need "shoulder to shoulder"

time just to be there with them.  We were created to be his

helper.  Made from him, under his arm and close

to his heart.  What a comfortable place to be too!  We are

not called to change their hearts.  That's Gods job.  The

word does say how we live, not what we nag, I mean

say, carries much more weight.

Take time to Respect your husband today.  In his book

Love and Respect Eggerichs challenges wives to tell their

husbands somethings they sincerely respect about them. 

Try it.  See what happens.

(first published 12-11-10)